Today I got back on the blog bandwagon.  I love the blog bandwagon.  I think everyone should have a place to put memories, favorite things, what you are up to, what you aren’t up to and, well, just sit and type/write.  I have always been a on again, off again blogger.  But I have had this blog for over 5 years.  How do I know?  I started it before I had my first son, Evan.  Friday, he will be 5.

I’ve written a lot about Evan.  About my pregnancy, shared by birth story (here & here), wrote a post being honest about how I felt when I found out I was pregnant.  I’d share milestones and tell you what our family was up to.  Of the thousands of words I’ve typed… None would ever do my sweet Evan justice.

Evan has been amazing from the start.  He was the sweetest baby, toddler and is a fabulous big brother.  He’s grown to be a sweet loving caring boy.  He is so genuine.

and handsome 😉 – but he is just wonderful.  He loves arts and crafts, his scooter, his friends (especially Finn!), and our family.  He is so in touch with his feelings and is a lover of life. He’s happy.  So happy.  He started soccer last fall and a mother came up to me and just said “he’s so happy, all the time” and my heart just filled with pride, such pride.  Deep down that’s all I want for him, happiness.  I want him to be happy, spread happy.  Stay positive and sweet and just love. life.

It’s really ironic how we are told to teach our children to be good humans.  Ironic how? He’s taught me to be a better human.  He’s taught me to slow down, not get mad, smile.  He wants everyone around him to be happy.  He sees life so simply.  He loves sugar, hates vegetables but today tried a piece of baby spinach from my salad because he knows health is important to me.  At 4 years and 360 days old he knows how to do this.  I fear for his sensitivity because I don’t want to ever see him hurt… I do not look forward to those days but I know he will get through them… because he is amazing.

Evan, my love, thank you for being my first baby.  The one who taught me I am good at something, who made me feel whole.  Thank you for being my angel here on earth, my light on the darkest of days.  My true hero, you are just everything.  Happy happy almost birthday to you.  I will get you a spider man cake so we can re-use your decorations from last year (he remembers! wants to recycle!!!).  I will also kiss and hug you so much. So. Much. and I apologize in advance for the tears.  They are happy tears because I just don’t know how I was so lucky to become YOUR mom.

Love you to the moon, sweet boy.  I want to hug your face the way your brother does: